Posts

Heaven, Hell, Demons, and Bringing the Kingdom to Earth

Susie shared the news with us this morning that Lauren told her that Carlos Griego now claims he is no longer a Christian.  It wasn't a huge surprise.  Carlos went through a whole lot through the Redemption experinece.  Susie said she thinks he processed the experience in a isolated way rather than having a community of believers around him to process it.  That makes sense.  I think that could have made a huge difference.   However, when you take a literal view of the Bible, then you try to think critically about whether or not it is true, you're definitely going to run into some challenging truths.   A few of these truths are heaven, hell, and demons.  At least this is what Elijah expressed this morning with some measure of frutration with these traditional beliefs held by the church.  One argument he used is that the Israelites did not have the concept of an afterlife.  Rather they held the notion that once you die that is th...
Post a Comment
Read more

Jesus and the Bridge to Cross the Divide between God and man

 Recently I hear the analogy of how we must go into the valley on our jouney to deep, close relationship to God.  That we must go to the emotion depths and face our shame and fears and hurts before we can enjoy an intimate relationship with God.  It's an analogy that makes a lot of sense.   However, there is another analogy that is similar yet very different.  It is the image of Christ as the bridge that connects God and man because of the separation we have from God because of our sin.  The bridge symbolized the work Christ did on the Cross for man to restore us to right relationship with God.  We must accept this gift to be able to cross the gulf to get to God.   The second image is a direct path to God, requiring us to give up nothing short of our life, yet the work is a mere decision to follow him.  The first image requires the hard word, and the long work, of working through the hurts of our lives.   While the two are...
Post a Comment
Read more

Emotionally Healthy Spirituality

 1.  2. 3. Silence 4. Time witih Jesus I have been attending church leadership meetings.  I'm not sure exactly why I am part of the group.  I know why Susie would be part of the group.  They have been life giving.  We are going through the book and workbook from Emotionally Healthy Discipleship.  It's great.  The author talks about 4 aspects of a emotionally healthy spirituality.   I guess the reason why i'm writing about this is because I have been spending time in silence and I have been (a little bit) talking with Jesus throughout the day.  More like acknowledging Jesus and his teaching throughout the day.  But it is a very different mindset toward God than what I have had for some time on a consistent basis.   Another practice that I have been attending to in a small part is memorizing and meditating on the Psalms.  The emotional outpouring of the authors is something I can tap into and search my own emotions...
Post a Comment
Read more

A Tough Season of my Life

 I have moments where I'm feeling pretty miserable.  As my pastoral counselor says, "hopelessness is very close."   Our 20th anniverary is less than 2 weeks away.  So far we have to plans to celebrate.  What would there be to celebrate?  Sure there have been some remarkable memories, but what do we have to show for it in our relationship.  The memories have beat me down more than they have drawn us together. I have little ability to be open and vulnerable with Susie.  When I an vulnerable it somes across as weakness.  Scott says that there is a bind when I communicate truth.  That is shows an honesty about me accepting who I am.  That there is an integrity to speaking my truth.  Even that this can come off as attractice even though I feel week when I express my weakness.   When Elijah is home it becomes all the more clear that she is making an effort to connect to others.  It is in the way that she seeks his...
Post a Comment
Read more

Heroes of the Faith

Spanish Carmelite mystic John of the Cross [1542–1591]. they too were inflamed with “love’s urgent longings”; they too went out into the dazzling dark with “no other light or guide than the [flame] that burned in [their] hearts.” [6] The Spirit of the Lord descended, and they experienced an inflow of divine love that gushed up, uniting their hearts in prayer and song and shout that “made heaven ring.”  Olaudah Equiano (1745–1797). “O, ye nominal Christians! might not an African ask you, learned you this from your God, who says unto you, Do unto all men as you would men should do unto you?”
Post a Comment
Read more

Love the Lord

 I think that's Susie's way of saying if someone is a good Christian or not.   I don't think that Susie would say that I am someone who loves the Lord.  What a disappointment that must be for her!?   And I must say that I am doing practices that help me draw near to God but that on most days God is not often on the forefront of my mind throughout the day.   So, I shouldn't compare because that is only going to make me feel more distant from God.   I just want Susie and me to be back on good terms.  These kids are so darn exhausting and not having her to deal with the stress of these kids is sucking the motivation to enjoy parenting.  I could go on about these kids but they are a handful.  I can hardly get a minute for myself.  
Post a Comment
Read more

Tough Times

 This is tough.  This is a really tough time.  I feel hopeful that Susie and I are in the process of restoring our relationship sometimes but then I get the feeling that things aren't really changing inside of her and inside of me.   As first I would just tell myself that Jesus is enough but I don't have that feeling so often anymore.  Maybe I need to start really asking God to be near to me.  I need to pray in the morning.  I need to meditate in the morning.  I want to continue to heal, not be in this stuck state that I am in.   26 more days until our 20th anniversary.  26 days.  It feels like such a pivital date to me.  Happy 20th anniversary.  It only makes me sad to think about those words.  It's not going to be much of a happy anniversary.  In fact, I have a basketball game that day.  Heck, it's even an away basketball game.  That way I won't even have to hardly see Susie that whole day....
Post a Comment
Read more